There was a conversation between myself and a coworker the other day that really got me thinking about oral. We were talking about sex (as you do at work) and the subject of blow jobs came up.
“If God wanted us to put them in our mouths he would have made penises flavored.” She told me in disgust.
“Umm.. he did… ” I replied. “They’re dick flavored!”
I know I can’t possibly be the only woman out there who loves to give oral, yet through my conversations with my fellow gender as well as my male friends, the subject of blow jobs seems to be that of a negative one to women. Giving good head is an art form that takes practice (lots, and lots of practice…), exploration, and desire. To be completely honest, I couldn’t say just how many unique members I’ve pleased orally, and I’d bet any average sexually active woman is the same in the sense that they’ve sucked more than they’ve fucked. I do remember in my teens being awful at it. It took a long while before I realized I had to ask what felt good and where.
Here are some of my thoughts on why someone might be against a little oral.
Lets be real, guys can be pretty gross sometimes. All that extra skin just flopping around down there all day… soaking up the sweat… eww… ( :: breaks to take a shower :: ) Ok. Much better. But seriously… I have never dated a guy who at some point or another had a long hard day and just wasn’t feeling it down under. Thankfully most were open enough to let me know up front, but I have had a few instances where foreplay began with “hey baby… let’s get naked and rub each other down in a hot steamy shower!” Problem solved.
Trying to Emulate Porn
Lets be real, those girls have a ton of experience, hours of shooting, breaks, lights, makeup, and well-trained gag reflexes. Porn is made to be visually pleasing and I guarantee you most of the men receiving in the films A) don’t really give a shit and B) would rather have a good old-fashioned sucking rather than some girl finger flicking his cock and making weird duck faces with their tongue hanging out.
Past (Bad) Experiences
We tend to let our pasts rule our futures. For example, If we fall off the swing set and break a leg, well, fuck that bitch, we’re never gonna swing again! Too often (I am very guilty of this) do we have a shitty breakup or bad lay then check that type or experience off our list never to be revisited again. It’s not crazy to try again, just do something different this time!
He Was Bad at Receiving
Blow jobs are not one-sided. I am not just on my knees, back, or (on special occasion) hanging upside down sucking off a magical floating dick. Whether it’s a slight hair tug, a cheek caress, thrusting, gyrating, or any other action he may make, it all affects the quality and enjoyability of the job. Some guys just really suck at this. I’ve had the over zealous thruster seemingly trying to knock my teeth out, the over reacher who thinks somehow my mouth and ass can be in the same vicinity at once, and the stiff, who, well, doesn’t do anything at all. These guys really made the job unsatisfying and I couldn’t be more relieved to move on to my next little snowflake of a penis, but I never let these experiences define my opinion on oral.
You Just Don’t Like It
Hey, to each her own. There really are some gals out there that for whatever mental or physical reason don’t like giving oral pleasure. As for me, I will continue on my journey of licking, sucking, nibbling, kissing, and stroking. One cock at a time… or two… or three…